Yesterday morning, I began my devotional at the house of prayer with the chorus of a song called “Lord, I Need You” by Matt Maher, and the Lord took me on an incredible journey of His heart.
“I need You, Lord, I need You. Every hour, I need You. My one defense, my righteousness. Oh God, how I need You.”
I could then, and even still now, feel this cry rising up from the inside of me. My deep calling out to His deep. Wanting to be hungry, desperate…willing to be captured by the beauty of His holiness. I wanted to be found waiting there for Him, wanting more of His holiness in me, wanting more of Him.
In my last blog, I wrote about the rivers of living water that flow from the chests (John 7:38) of those who believe, and how it is an endless source of truth and freedom. Yesterday, I started to sing about those rivers, I remembered something the Lord showed me a few years ago. I saw Jesus sitting on the throne, and when He began to speak, water flowed as a river from His mouth. His voice of many waters (Rev. 1:15) surrounded and lifted me up. As I remembered this, I saw myself sitting under the His shade, waiting beside the river. The shade I was under was that of a tree of healing (Rev. 22:2). I just wanted to see Him and hear His voice. Then I was singing about being in that river, floating in the current of His voice, of His strength, and it took me back to Psalm 42. It was as if I could feel His waves and billows crashing over me, filling my deep, carrying me. This chorus came out, “I want to see You, I want to hear You, I want to know You and be found in You, Jesus…I see the fire in Your eyes, Your hair white as wool, I hear Your voice of many waters…” Then He revealed something that is amazing…
“You are Love. You are Holy. When I open wide to receive Your love, You’re making me holy. LOVE MAKES ME HOLY. This is what it looks like when Love speaks. Love breathes fire. Love’s voice pours living water. My earth (my soul) is in need of fire and water. Fire purifies earth, killing the weeds and everything, creating new and fertile dirt. Then water is poured, bringing new life. Love breathes fire. Love speaks water. Love is making me holy. Love is making me new.”
Our God is an all-consuming fire. Our God is the source of living water. Our God is love. He is completely other than, set apart, holy. And it is His holy love, fire, and water that transforms us into the image of His Son. “Holiness is Christ in me” (lyrics from Matt Maher’s song). When God looks at me, that holiness is all He sees. And so I sang, “I will set my gaze on You, and receive Your love…” Love covers me and you and everything in between.
I ended my devotional time with the song “The More I Seek You” by Zach Neese, but Jesus changed some of the lyrics and sang it back to me. He sings it over you too.
“Come and sit at My feet. Drink from the cup in My hand. Lay back against Me and breathe. You can feel My heartbeat. My love for you is deep. There is no need for you to stand. Come and melt in My peace…”